Well, l...

Well, life has been going on in its usually pattern. The sun still rises in the east and sets in the west as gravity continues to take its toll on my feet.I realize I live two different lives. There's my safe and innocent one where I have my Angel, and my darling boyfriend. And I can dream and dream and be perfectly content.Then there is the life that I have to wake up to every morning that consists of problems I actually don't know the answers to. That's it, I'm grabbing my blanket and going back to sleep.~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~I'm usually one who doesn't care what people think about me but it occurred to me today that maybe I should at least know whether I care or not. But then I'm almost afraid of what the answer would be. Not as in would it be what I want to hear as much as would it be completely honest. I don't know.All that I'm sure of is that I am me and like this person for the most part. To hell with whether everyone else does or not.~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~I finally went out to the club last night. It was quite interesting for the most part. I saw LaTara up there and I couldn't believe my eyes. My sweet, mild-mannered, Tara was being as wild and loose as...yeah. I also saw Katie O'neil up there and it brought back a lot of memories. Unfortunately for me though, I was with Archie and seeing as how she and Katie despise one another...I didn't get much time for reminiscing. But up until the end, Katie was probably best described as the girl of my dreams. But then she visciously turned on me and I have no idea why. Still, when I saw her last night, I didn't see the girl who talked bad about me and would intentionally push all my buttons, but the girl who would curl up beside me and tell me her problems, fears, and secrets, knowing they and herself were completely safe with me. Katie meant a lot to me and I want so much to dislike her for the way she did me, but it's impossible. I loved Katie and I can't hate her for any reason. However, I do realize nothing will change between us. Even if she is over whatever she was pissed off at me for to begin with, we could never go back to being those two girls who never held back anything from eachother. I just really miss her; hell, I miss having that kind of connection with any girl.~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Speaking of Luscious Lesbian Lovers... has anybody heard the band T.A.T.u's c.d.? They're two Russian Lesbians that publicly announces through their lyrics their love for eachother. They're awesome and I'm in love. Hehehe. Of course, I love anybody that openly defies society like that.~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~okay i'm through. love 'ya guys.~Red